tomphippen.com » Internet

For the tight fisted cynics

tom — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 19:21:48 +0000

My Amazon shopping history is probably the least feminine¹ around, accurately suggesting a single male household. Still that didn’t stop this bit of cynicism:

I did like that the best seller is £11.54, some lucky ladies are going to feel very loved on valentines day.

¹ at least how feminine is generally considered, I get that some women do like SF, Cricket and can understand the offside rule

Phippen’s Law

tom — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 21:34:31 +0000

This is my chance to be a less famous Godwin.

Phippen’s Law: As an online discussion, that is directly or indirectly about Ricky Gervais, grows longer, the probability of someone saying “Am I the only person who doesn’t find Ricky Gervais funny?” approaches 1.

He’s a miracle, Saviour of the universe, King of the impossible – Cash Gordon

tom — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 21:04:33 +0000

Any number of things are wrong with the tory’s comically bad attempts to smear Gordon Brown, here’s a list:

There’s a lot of actual shit things about New Labour they could talk about (although to be fair to the tories most of these things are tory policy)
Making me think of Flash Gordon means I’ve got Queen and Brian Blessed stuck on a loop in my head, which is a good thing
Complaining that a union, which about 4% of voters are members of, has an unfair say in Labour policy, when you’re run by a 1 guy who’s a thieving billionaire scum bag who only cares about increasing his already obscene wealth, is a bit off.
Oh, and you fucked it up completely:
- Congratulated themselves for doing a great job before the shit hit the fan (and even if it hadn’t there’s only 617 people signed up)
- Didn’t understand how twitter, or html injection worked
- Caused a funny graph to be made
- and got a torygraph stooge to say it was teh hax0rs

The internet is great

Facebook Ate My Hamster

tom — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:21:09 +0000

Read my story exclusively in tomorrow’s Daily Mail

Question

tom — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 21:55:08 +0000

When a spam tweet has ‘cum’ written in it, is it because ‘cum’ spells ‘cum’ or because the message was 141 characters?

The new Beeb style guide

tom — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 09:19:54 +0000

looks good [via]

If you don’t know html & css then you’re not a web designer

tom — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 22:48:30 +0000

You’re a graphic designer, and there’s nothing wrong with that it’s a completely legitimate career. But you’re not a web designer, drawing websites in Photoshop makes you a web designer in the same way that this image makes me an architect.

Facebok Login

tom — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 14:40:50 +0000

Username

Password

Obviously this doesn’t do anything, I just thought it’d be funny with the recent login kerfuffle, especially with the intentional misspelling of Facebook I might get a few hits on Google. I’m aware that I’m a bastard.

Getting SEO advice from your webhost…

tom — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 14:36:53 +0000

…is like getting advice on what to say to your customers on the phone from BT

A guide to Search Engine Optimisation for clients of web design companies

tom — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 20:15:55 +0000

A lot of clients who hire some designers to design & build their website will pay a third party for SEO, often too much relative to what their paying for the design and development. Here are the steps you need to follow for budgeting.

Take the number of sales you make to Search Engine’s spiders (which is 0)
Prefix it with your local currency’s symbol (for UK visitors £0)
Spend that much on SEO
Take the money you were going to spend on SEO and hire a copywriter.

Because good content is important, maybe if it was called Potential Customer Experience Optimisation (PCEO™) clients would pay silly money for it.